In The Dark

Martha took pride in her status in the community and everything in her life had to be perfect. She wept tears of joy when she gave birth to her twin girls Lily and Lana, two little girls with blonde hair, blue eyes and a smile that would melt your heart. The first few years of life were a hurricane of pigtails, birthday parties and pageants, Martha always finding opportunities to show off her darlings. She thought they all had the perfect life until they grew up to become teens and that is when she noticed a stark difference in their personalities. Lana was a quiet girl who liked wearing flowery dresses, kept her hair always neat, did her home work, loved school and listened to everything her mother told her to do. Lily on the other hand was rebellious, sometimes her mother would refer to her as the demon child, late for school or skipping it completely, dark clothing, wild looking hair and very little respect for her mother and her wishes.

Martha was honestly embarrassed to tell others that Lily was her child and the way she acted was tarnishing her idea of a perfect reputation among society so in her sick twisted mind she felt she had no other choice then to rid herself of the problem. She convinced her daughter to go on a mother daughter shopping trip in another county, that she would buy her whatever she wanted. She told Lana that she would bring her back something from their trip and both girls agreed so the plan was set in motion. They had been gone for most of the day and Lana spent most of her time reading a book and catching up on a class project that was due in a couple of days. When she finally heard her mothers car in the driveway she ran to the door but only saw her mother get out, her mother in a state of panic. She ran out the door to her mother asking where Lily was and all her mother could say was that there had been an accident and Lily was gone. She was quite the performer, forcing herself to shed tears, shake enough to convince Lana and eventually others that Lily had disappeared from the store and by the time she was found, she was gone. The grief Lana felt was unbearable and the funeral went by in a blur with neighbors, family and friends giving their condolences but she did not remember any of it. She sat in the car as her mother and the others said their last goodbyes then excused herself from the car and went to the grave telling her mother she needed time alone.

She waited till the last car had disappeared and she walked to where her sister was buried and stood silently by the grave just staring at the headstone thinking about all the things she did not get to tell her sister before losing her. Slowly she reached out her left hand to place it on top of the mound of dirt, as if she could feel her sister one last time, a warmth seemed to spread through her hand and into her body but it mostly went unnoticed to her because of her state of loss. She stood back up, brushed the dirt off her hand and straightened her dress, looking one last time before she made the agonizing walk back towards her home, back to the room she used to share with her sister. As she approached the front door she could hear her mothers laugh and the clinking of a bottle against a glass which seemed like a strange thing to hear after losing a daughter. She stepped inside and when her mother heard the front door open, the sound stopped and she found her mother sitting in the living room holding onto a picture of Lily with her fake tears on her cheeks. Lana brushed past her and headed upstairs to the room they had once shared and flopped down on the bed, exhausted from all of it and fell asleep. 

By morning things would begin to change, subtle at first but still change. She had taken a couple of days off of school to grieve her loss so she did not have to get up early and she didn’t. She stayed in bed much longer than she normally would despite her internal alarm clock which automatically went off every day. She yawned and stretched before sliding off the covers and placing her feet on the floor, feeling a little out of sorts but nothing to be concerned about. She walked to the closet and opened the door, staring at the clothing like she was seeing it for the first time, her hands first tracing over the collection of dresses and sweaters that hung there like they were waiting for a prim and proper girl to slip them on. Her gaze becomes fixed on the other half of the closet, a mixture of black and grey clothing, some with tears in it, some with chains attached, very dark in nature but somehow much more appealing. She pulled out a black shirt with something scribbled on it with white writing and slipped it on, then she found a pair of jeans with a rip in the knees and tugged them on before looking at herself in the mirror. The look seemed to suit her and nothing felt out of place. She finally slides her feet into a pair of black studded boots, cut short at the ankle and heads down the stairs, skipping over every other step as her boots clunk against the wood. Her mother looks up as she hears her daughter and is a little caught off guard as she sees her dressed up in her dead sister's clothes. Perhaps it is her own way of grieving but her daughter did not seem the least bit upset but almost content with herself.

 With each passing day she began to notice her ‘good girl’ acting more and more stranger but she pushed down any guilt she was feeling and brushed it off as a phase she was going through and that she would soon return to the proper girl she had raised but she had no idea how wrong she truly was. It was a bright Sunday morning when Martha is standing in front of the sink washing the dishes from the night before when Lana strolls into the kitchen and plops herself down on one of the chairs at the kitchen table and starts scrolling through her phone ignoring her mother then out of the blue without looking up she says” Why don’t you call me Lily bear any more?” Her mother almost drops the plate in her hand because that was the secret pet name she had for her other daughter that no one else ever knew about. Before she even gets a chance to respond Lana continues” I don’t even know why I said that” then shrugs it off before getting up from the table and heading out of the house for the day. Martha is now becoming paranoid but tries to convince herself that Lily must have shared that with Lana but she was becoming rattled. The next morning, trying to calm herself, Martha is in the kitchen bright and early preparing eggs for her daughter because it was her favorite breakfast when her daughter steps into the kitchen taking a seat at the table with her phone in hand and says “why aren’t you making my pancakes and bacon?” sniffing the air. Her mother drops the spatula and turns to look at her daughter, wanting to say something but nothing will come out then Lana says” make sure to cook two slices of toast to go with the eggs this morning.” Now Martha is beginning to think she is losing her mind The week goes by with minimal contact, watching her good daughter change into a mirror image of the daughter she had disposed of and it was creating cracks in her mental stability, most likely the guilt of what she had done was now manifesting itself in ways she had not imagined.

By the time Friday night rolled around, she was hanging on by a thread but she did her best not to snap. Lana was in the bathroom aggressively brushing her hair to tease it, and Martha reluctantly walks  in with a handful of fresh towels, wanting to quickly hang them up on the towel rack and leave. Lana does not even look away from the mirror as she hears her mother enter and in a clear voice speaks” Why did you leave me in the dark to die alone?” Martha stumbles backwards, the towels falling to the floor as her hands fly to her mouth to cover it, unable to scream out loud. A small grin crosses the lips of the girl as she continues to stare into the mirror “Did you miss me?”

That night neighbors reported seeing Martha running down the middle of the street screaming and pulling at her hair, babbling incoherently about her dead daughter coming back to punish her and the police were called. Martha ended up being checked into a mental hospital where she would rock back and forth on the bed and pound her fists against her head as if that would make it all stop. Lana makes only one visit to the psychiatric hospital to see her mother and to this day no one talks about what was said, but all that is known is that by the time the visit ended Lana walked out of there with a confession in her hand. Lily decided that she was not returning to the grave and Martha would one day realize that she had lost both of her daughters.