se7en

I've decided that stupid people are just the universe's way of beta-testing problems before they reach the rest of us.

They're the ones who will drink the liquid in a bottle labeled "Do Not Drink" just to see if it's a suggestion. They're the human equivalent of a bird flying directly into a clean glass door, serving as a vital warning to all other birds that, hey, maybe physics is still a thing.

Without them, we'd never know if a "Wet Paint" sign was a lie. We'd have no live-action demonstrations of why you shouldn't use a toaster in the bathtub. They are the unsung heroes of our survival, the brave pioneers who boldly go where no one with a functioning brain stem has gone before.

So, the next time you see someone trying to pay for gas with a gift card to a seafood restaurant, don't get mad. Give them a slow, respectful nod. They're not just being an idiot; they're taking the intellectual bullet for the team. They are the firewall between us and utter chaos. Thank you for your service, you glorious, magnificent morons.