I had written before about putting my walls back up and I have..........but only so far. I decided I did not want to become the person who is cold, unfeeling and uncaring and having my wall all the way up would make me that type of person. My wall is up about half way and I have distanced myself from negative, bitter people and I am a much happier person for it. I don't need people in my life who will question who I am, question every aspect of my life or judge me based either on the words of others or on their own delusional thoughts of who they think I am. And its because of this that my circle of friends mean more to me than almost anything. I have surrounded myself with wonderful, amazing people who only bring out the best in me.......they don't judge me, they accept me for who I am. I love them all dearly.
I want to touch on one more thing.........rumors and gossip. I know there are a lot of rumors and gossip going around about me and I admit, at first it bothered me. But now, I could care less. Anymore, I just let them say what they will.........I just remind myself that just because they say it, doesn't make it true. They don't know me, they never took the time to get to know me and they don't know my story. So let them judge me, let them gossip about me.......its really a reflection of them and not me. We should all remember, if they gossip to you, they will gossip about you. ;)
At the end of the day, there will always be someone who will judge you, gossip about you and spread false rumors about you. The best thing anyone can do (and its what I do) is not give them a moment of your time, your thoughts or attention. They will soon enough move on to someone else. Let them continue being petty and bitter people and just go on with your own life. We are responsible for our own happiness and I can say, I am happier than I have been in a long time.
hugs